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Moving boxes

I am moving backwards through my life,
Soon to be spatialised, catalogued, and titled.
I picture it –
Already gone.

Fingering its contents.
I am moving through
A favored museum.
A Medieval Priestess
Caring for souls.

Selecting, to preserve this one.
Safeguarding a misunderstood notion
Of my undervalued heritage.
It is a great production

This exhibit:
“Remember the time;”
That exhibit:
“When I was.”

Wrapping it up,
It disappears
Into smoothed papered assurances,
Like butchered meats.

I am satisfied, proud even.
The purchase it gives me,
Something to hold on to.
An illusion of my reality.

Filling boxes.
My back burdened of the stuff
That has made me.
I am a tired curator.

The artist’s rival, banking on futures, coming attractions.
Imagining new marble statues,
Declarations on pedestals
Of my next show.

October 13, 2014

toe in water
Big toe stuck in the water.

“Stick your toe in,” now stuck.
Paralyzed.

One foot in and one foot out.
Out of balance,

Fearful that I shall fall –
Fail.

Slip under and drown.
Faced with the murky possibilities of
Unknown muddied waters.

Neck, hips and knee
Painfully holding on
To the moment just before
I let go.

B e c om i n g a statue,
I am
Marmoreal.
A mere imitation of myself,
Naked for all to see in a museum of highly polished possibilities.

I am b e c o m i n g very hard and cold,
Eyes, wide discs dilated,
Stone of expression.
Unresponsive in my angle of repose.
A great monument for a moment.

Then,
Questioning –
“Who’s hands are at the rims of the pupils,
Waving frantically,
Screaming from loud, black holes,
Sounding all the world?”
But me? Stone deaf to the call.

Until,
I notice.
Sensate.
Somewhere off center,
Deep and tucked-in,
The cerebellum hums.
I B l i n k!

Dorsal nexus lights,
Thinking runs,
Feeling rolls.
Breathing in deep,
I
AM
pp iiii nnnnn gggggg kkkkkkk dddddaah
PINK! as a new born.

The water is cold.
Knee bends to the ball of my foot.
Body leans into the surrender.
Metatarsals grip and lift.
Arms, lovingly
Prepare for flight.
B e s i d e me,
Then,
Up
Over my head,
Graceful, like an ancient bird,
Leading the way.
Knee bows to the vertebrate,
Ball springs,
Up
And big toe is the last one in.

UNSTUCK!

September 2013