Archive

Change Your Brain

WwNKDXkI have been up since three am shaking the trees. I set my alarm based on the forecast and when it went off I turned on the outside light hoping against the odds that it wouldn’t be true, but it was.

Big, wet flakes were pouring from the night sky. I wanted to be frantic, after all what kind of a world do I live in where it snows on my gorgeous purple Foxglove – testing their spines for endurance, or the giant peony beginning to splay over, what about the hosta and don’t even talk to me about the brand new Japanese Maple with its fragile new leaves. I was off to the races.

What a cruel, cruel world. And there I was, out in it. Wet, heavy snow demanding that everything bend to its ruling. Headlight over the top of my hat, donned in a sweater and rain coat, the poor choice of snow boots when rain boots were for the job. Forget about gloves, my fingers are now worthless. Get the picture. This is still going on at 10 am, out every hour shaking off the threat.

It is not so much that it is snowing, it never lasts long here and it is pretty. It is more that it is not what I thought would happen and even knowing that it might happen, I didn’t really know what I could do about it. I felt helpless against the odds.

There is an ABUNDANCE of that out there right now: helpless against the odds. You don’t need me telling you that. We all know, and we are all tired of the reminder that there is no control. I got the memo, you got the memo, but still it bears reminders.  I can control nothing. I never could and I never will. It is impossible. Physics won’t allow for it. NO CONTROL, only influence.

The good thing about influence is that it is more powerful then control because it endures. Those staked garbage bags over my Foxglove? They are working with me to keep those stunning flowers healthy, and I am working with them by shaking off the snow they are keeping out so together we can keep on protecting my flowers. I, in collaboration with those bags, the snow, and the foxglove, am influencing a different outcome.

The opposition between Venus and Jupiter is big. There is good potential for magnifying the importance of things, letting things get blown out of proportion. If needed, re-read the first paragraph. Be mindful to that which you set an alarm. You don’t have to be alarmed and you don’t have to make it alarming. Do what you want. Create the life you want to live.

Pluto in Capricorn is squaring the opposition between Venus and Jupiter. This can likely incite the manipulative tactic of he said, she said, the dog said. This kind of communication is fraught with hostility, aggression and, I am sad to say – meant to harm.

Be mindful. Stay grounded. Remember what you want. Act in your best interest. See what happens that you like and can build on. Me? I am looking forward to seeing those wonderful Foxglove after the snow.


In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

 

The-moon's-gravitational-force-Artwork by T. Boehle “The moon’s gravitational force”

I am in a plane headed out to a place far enough away that the fastest means of transportation is the air. I going somewhere else to re-boot, relax, and literally get a new perspective. There was a time when doing such involved wee morning hours of cooking a fabulous picnic and loading up in a horse-powered buggy destined for the countryside.

It wasn’t easy getting here. The morning had an interesting start. The seemingly near Chinook winds kept me up most of the night, whipping in through the cat door. The flap of it flapping and papers blowing about our bedroom all night. It was spooky. In and out of sleep, the sounds reconciled in that half-wit state as haunted. In the morning I woke tired, fully awakened by an eight foot by four foot painting crashing off the wall, smashing its frame to smithereens. The bus to the airport made unexpected stops and at the airport my boarding pass wouldn’t scan so, despite my TSA-Pre standing, it was back to check-in again for a new pass. We raced through the airport and salvaged the plan of eating breakfast at Root Down by getting carry out for the plane, and arrived just in time to board when someone over the load speaker said our flight was delayed and hour and a half!

Hmm. My resources are low. I think of my kids, get out my phone and text them: “Flight delayed. Be safe. I love you.” I am tired and, honestly, the fitful night’s sleep provided the perfect backdrop for thinking about scary stuff despite the fact that there wasn’t really anything more scary then Colorado winds. But what about the painting? That is weird and, furthermore, that painting signified to me a deep understanding of myself, the universe, and me in the universe. And, really? The boarding pass doesn’t scan and then the plane has mechanical problems?

But I have done this before, gotten myself worked up about the secret meaning of things. There is a big difference between intuition and anxiety. Yes, it does seem my ability to get where I am going is slowed, and whenever the expected becomes the unexpected the cognitive brain sets about to solve the mystery, and usually from the worst-case scenario. All, of course, in an effort at self-preservation. And, ironically, the impetus for that can, and after years of practice, does bring my attention to the goodness in my life. The wind, stirring things up, relentless to not let lying dogs sleep. I love that fury and determination. The painting jumping off the wall and crashing straight to the floor like a declaration, “Remember there are no happy chances, only the infinite opportunity to create them.” The resistance met at getting to the gate, the delayed plane all reminders of three things:

  1. There is no control. Control is an illusion.
  2. Influence is the powerful force behind the smoke and mirrors of control.
  3. Things aren’t always what they seem to be.

I will be on terra firma soon enough, and I trust I will have a deeply satisfying experience, because once I get out of my own fearful way I can see that I can always be heading in the direction of where I want to be. Where I am isn’t where I am headed; it is only from which I am starting.

The March 12th Full Moon in Virgo is pulling a lot of big pieces together and bringing them down to Earth. It is a good vibration for healing some stuff way out there in your past. Think about it this way, you can think about yourself or you can think about your self as a part the whole. This can be very enlightening. Mind getting spooked, trust that it is not always and might be nearly never about you alone. Find the value where you can, re-evaluate your route, and keep on keeping on.


In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

originalThese days it may seem as if it has never been truer that the probability of survival is equal to the angle of arrival.  While it may have been said that flying is the second greatest thrill known to humans, landing is the first!

We have a lunar eclipse pending in Leo tonight. I am looking forward to it. I could use a lift from the same old news and Leo is just the creative entrepreneur I want when I am figuring how to get around the turbulence of my old patterns and history.

Saturn is aspected in Sagittarius for this eclipse. Argh!  What a drag.  My “around the world, free as a bird, solo flight” will now be chaperoned with the harsh  judgments of a “straighten up and fly right” kind of bird.  This is going to require some major wind beneath my wings in order to make any progress.

I hear you, why is there always a drag? I know, who wants a drag?  But that drag serves purpose in the aerodynamics of ascension.  It creates a necessity to welcome one thing while embracing another. The trajectory forward is found through the resistance of the two opposed energies. The resistance can provide balance until we have momentum in what can be, the choppy blue yonder.

Mind feeling that resistance as a force against you, particularly one that you imagine you need to defend yourself from.  Instead, remember that the resistance is going to allow you to move forward.  It is not what you think.  It is not holding you back, it is there to get you up and going!

This month, consider practicing in tandem with the resistance and take off and land from the high ground.

  1. Change your mind to feel comfortable with the benefits of resistance.
  2. Mind thinking about changing other people’s minds until you have changed yours.
  3. Get clear AND curious (no judgment) about what you want.
  4. Simotaneously respect your ideas and those that seemingly oppose your ideas.
  5. Find the tension between the seemingly opposed and utilize that tension as common ground for take off and landing.

Afterall, flying is undoubtedly an adventure in discovery, but a good take off and a safe landing can’t be beat.


In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

 

 

 

 

 

60b1e524_shamanic_drumming_small
The work ahead is to heal the divide without becoming divided, and the transverse is giving us more then just two ways to do that. The Moon in Pisces, conjunct Neptune could have you feeling disappointed or confused. Saturn in Sagittarius does its best to provide another way to think about things, but Mars in Aquarius objects, and is determined to protest and beat on a whole other drum.

I have been missing in action for a little bit. I went out to mend fences a few weeks ago and got caught up in a deep conversation about areodynamics with the dead. Today, I am making my way out of the rabbit hole. On landing, I see that things are the same and I see that they are different. I think my recent conversation may be helpful.

Life is composed of two seemingly opposed energies. We are taught to live life within the boundaries of these polarities. Am I right? Or am I wrong? What do you think? But it doesn’t matter what you think. What matters, is what you know.

Knowing, like “seeing,” is an intelligence that is acquired when the mind and the body communicate with each other and then with the rest of the transverse. So what do you notice that you know, what do you see? Do you notice a certain emotional experience around an intellectual inquiry? On my recent journey, I noticed that I was afraid to ask the very question I had set out to answer. I felt the fear in a tightening through my chest and the shortness of my breath. “Don’t ask unless you listen,” I was told. Hmm, I thought I could do it, but when it really came time, I knew I wasn’t ready. I could feel the weight of it. I was afraid to say what I wondered out loud.  I was afraid to make it a real query and not just an idea in my head. I knew that saying aloud would release it from the fantasy that I could control it’s outcome, it’s truth. I knew my expression of it would make it real.

I was afraid to listen. I was afraid to hear. I didn’t want to see what the future might hold. I hesitated to move forward. Fear attracts danger and I saw all the possible bad ways this could work out. And then I was told, “If you want to understand, you will have to look into it.” And I heard the words and knew that my quest could never be contained in the boundaries of some intellectual pursuit. What a drag. An idea is fine, but it would take more then musing to make it valuable. The last messenger, impatient or perhaps enthusiastic, shouted at me, “Get out of here, go! Go, go, go!”

Thrusted forward, back into the evolutionary game, up the rabbit hole and out of there. Back here, where Donald Trump is president and the weather in Boulder Colorado is sunny and some men are making a very dusty mess in my house, and Charlie our cat still has no teeth. See what I mean, some things are different and some things are the same.

1. It is not what you think that matters, it is what you know. 
2. Don’t ask, unless you listen. 
3. If you want to understand, you will have to look into it. 
4. Go forward in service of what really matters to you. 

Begin now. Embrace your human-ness while striving for the Divine. This will give you lift. It is not what you think that matters, it is what you know. It may be necessary to see what you think, and then see what you feel, and then see everything in between. If you want to know the answer to the question, you will have to listen to all the information. This will ground you. Sometimes, when things are complex, it is a drag. But that drag serves purpose, it creates a necessity to accept one thing while embracing another. The trajectory forward is found through the resistance of the two opposed energies. In this way, things aren’t always what they seem to be, and in that case, there is always room for things to be different.

Go into the rabbit hole. Travel into the strange trip of your life and be birthed again in the wisdom of greater knowing. Now see what you want to do about it.


In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

face_in_landscape_1

I was down the rabbit hole earlier this week. In the burrow, that temporary refuge against exposure created on instinct and as a byproduct of locomotion. I found myself there after hiking 3000 feet up Ruby Mountain  with the rising of the full moon in Capricorn. Interestingly, I had worked this moon cycle with the intention of experiencing more fun in my life and bringing better balance to the serious side of myself, which had felt burdened as of late. So, yeah, I see now what you probably already see. I hear you saying to me, with your head tilted to the side in mocked curiosity, “You were in search of fun so you climbed a mountain?”

Okay, so to be fair, it was the Wildflower Festival in Crested Butte, and what is more joyful than flowers?  There was also that romantic reference of Julie Andrews atop the mountain singing the hills are alive. But yes, I hear you, romance is different than fun. So, while the July full moon, or Thunder Moon, was rising in earthy Capricorn, I made my way up to 12,000 feet above sea level where I could see with great perspective my day’s journey.

It was literally breath-taking.  From that vista, my journey was reduced to a barely noticeable line that, while etched in the earth, at times skipped and disappeared completely. The waterfalls and rushing creeks that feed the mountain lakes became doll house versions of themselves. Avalanched snow bstrokes became painted brush strokes on the mountainsides, and the ever abundant wildflowers simply disappeared into the mountain valley of green. It was glorious, and at the top, catching my breath, I marveled at my endurance, my ability to survive such rigor. Certainly, I recognized that others have endured more, but I held a sense of satisfaction in my own accomplishment. By the time I had descended back down to 8909 feet I was surprised to discover that I was in a dark hole. Unbeknownst to me, I had been digging my way there all along. Sure, there were physiological reasons for my exercise-induced depression from lack of oxygen, withdrawal from high endorphin levels, and just pure exhaustion. But, as I considered my desperate feelings laced with tremendous anxiety, I knew I had been considering my immortality all along the hike. Can I do this? Will I make it? Could my heart beat right out of my chest? Would I run out of water?

It was no wonder I had metaphorically burrowed into the safety of the earth where the sides of the world would press up against me and hold me safely in place. I was under pressure on that mountain hike. Of my own making, for sure, and while real in my head and body, I am not implying that my self-imposed life or death crisis warranted the same social concern as other mountain journeys in everyday life, like clinical depression and anxiety, or loss of income or of a loved one. But, all the same, the experience provided me a relatively safe opportunity to practice the lessons of self preservation in the face of fear.

The sensations of deep sadness and panic were a surprise. Denial had been at work. It had protected me from my fears, but with enough time and pressure even denial cried “Uncle” and I felt scared and even hopeless. It came down on me like one of those avalanches I had crossed. I was underneath it, deep in it when I remembered to breathe. In for 4, hold for 2, and exhale for 6. Just three times and then I returned to my normal breath. I did it as often as was needed and it helped release me from my irrational self, that part that was scratching against the dirt, trying to take cover.

Okay, I am under pressure, I thought. Meet pressure with pressure, carefully though, without panic and with thought. I grounded in the present reality where I was NOT dying of lack of oxygen, but was laying on cool crisp white sheets. I could hear the sounds of children running outside my room and the smell of popcorn wafted through the open patio door. A patch of sunlight fell on the floor and I watched it fade over the time that I spent prone on the bed waiting my turn in the shower.

It took two days to find my way out of the labyrinth. That place of convolutions and distortions, mostly self-inflicted, and it required that I was my own best friend. Reminding myself to breathe, to notice my feet on the ground, to see literally where I was in each moment and experience that moment through my five concrete senses. “You are alive,” I told myself, “Wake up, you are alive.”

Did all that beauty scare the bejeepers out of me? Was it too much wonder for my brain to comprehend? Was I humbled in the glory? Over the course of my hike, my thoughts turned to love and loss.  To my children and the desire for them to experience that mountain climb with me despite the impossibility; to creatures I had loved and laid to rest; to considerations that I am stronger than I thought I was; and, often, to the realization that even so, I am still vulnerable.

Lately, many of us have been asking the question: How do we live in a world full of such suffering? My answer is two-fold. 1. Trust that everyone has the right to live their own journey. 2. Find time and space to have fun and enjoy being alive.


In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

4k03jls

Mars goes direct on Wednesday. This is good news, but it might be a bit like an angry crowd demanding access to shelter from the storm, as Mars will go direct conjunct the Moon and Uranus in Aries.

If you have been working hard these past few weeks, you probably have “taken care” of the walking dead of your past, but it can’t hurt to look over your shoulder one last time for any straggling zombies of your past. It might be like one of those movies, you may want to high step it, think fast, and fire with deliberation. The caveat here? Don’t discharge your weapon if you don’t want somebody to get hurt.

We have been in the thick of our defense mechanisms for a few months now. In psychodynamic theory, defense mechanisms are the unconscious, primitive manners in which we think, feel, and act. They serve to defend us from that which we perceive as threatening, like zombies of the past. If you have been paying attention lately, you probably have noticed which of the defense mechanisms is your drug of choice. Is it denial? Maybe, acting out or regressing? How about reaction formation? Compartmentalizing? Projecting, repressing, dissociating, rationalizing, undoing, intellectualizing, regressing, displacing, or rationalizing?  Yep, there is more than one way to get the job done. But now that you know about your zombies and you know how you always ridiculously think you can out run them, now that you know that, you might want to do something else.

How about discharging a coping mechanism instead? My favorite is sublimation. How about consciously turning that impulsive, primitive, fear of zombies into something that changes the storyline for the betterment of yourself and everyone around you. Why not see yourself this week as useful and constructive? Why not be the person who can look curiously at the zoombies and decide mind fully just what you want to do about the zombie troubles. And then it might be okay to go ahead and do it. And then it might be okay to go ahead and exit the scene of the walking dead stage left.

But wait, there is more. We are not done yet. We’ve still got to create the post-apocalyptic world. So take a few minutes to write it down, sketch it out, or daydream your fantasy about the deadly zombies. This time, let the story go. Let it play itself out. Let it re-invent itself. Then, YOU, yes YOU, go see if it is possible to turn that story into a wonderful meal, a beautiful pot of flowers, a zombie free night out, a good bike ride, a hike in the woods, a swim in the river. You get what I mean, transform that zombie energy into something you can use and then channel that into to something you can create. It might be a good thing if the future isn’t what it used to be.

In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com

child_being_measured-L

Yesterday the Moon in Capricorn was conjunct Pluto. You may be surprised by some vestige of the past that you have been trying to control or be adult about. Luckily, this aspect is well supported with Mercury in Taurus and Jupiter in Virgo.  It doesn’t have to feel like a bite in the backside.  If you utilize these earth energy vibrations, you can bring patience and problem-solving to some old issue that previously may have exploded. In other words, you might just notice you have evolved past some aspects of the past.

Noticing your growth is paramount when it comes to easy access to your confidence. And your confidence is a stones throw to your competence. And your competence is at the center of your resilience. And your resilience is the foundation of your ability to trust. And trust is the key to taking risk. And risk is necessary to remain alive.

That might seem odd to you. You might think that playing it safe is how you remain alive. But you know how that thinking goes. Playing it safe as a way of living often leads to over thinking it. And if you live your life in your head and not in your body, sooner of later the body suffers from lack of loving attention and opportunity to move and shake things up.

So this weekend, go ahead and back up into the yardstick tacked in the old door jamb. Stand tall, you know you want ALL the credit for how much you have grown. Take your hand and level it over the top of your head. Feel the anticipation of measuring your growth. Let it be exciting to consider that you have been growing wiser. No matter the amount, wiser is as wiser does.

In the midst of what you see as problematic, it can be difficult to recognize the opportunities. I can help you discover a new way of thinking that will assist you in managing and negotiating life’s obstacles. You will find that this new way of thinking provides you opportunities that you hadn’t previously noticed as well as affords you the confidence and desire to live your life in the driver’s seat.

Tami Satterfield, MSW, LCSW-C, NBCCH, HTP is a licensed psychotherapist who practices solution-oriented healing from a deep ecological perspective. Her specialities include hypnosis for anxiety, performance, and creativity. Sessions on-line or in Boulder, Colorado include cutting edge brain therapies that will change the way you think. Learn more at attentiontoliving.com